Recognising Self-worth

SETTING BOUNDARIES

As a foster carer, compassion for the young people entrusted to your care can sometimes lead you to pushing yourself beyond your energy and emotional wellbeing. As well as navigating through day to day challenges, you often have to accommodate the input of social work, medical and educational professionals while still maintaining your own family and relationships.

Setting healthy boundaries can help you navigate through. It's important to listen to your own voice amongst all the others and recognise that sometimes you can't please 'all of the people all of the time'.

Setting boundaries help you ask for what you need, they facilitate a sense of self-respect and help maintain your self-worth.

HOW TO WORK ON BOUNDARIES

Listen to the clues your body sends you about your needs or limits. Strong sensations are your body's way of communicating that a boundary has been crossed.
Core Values - complete the exercise on identifying your core values and work on being mindful of them in day to day life.
Practise saying 'No'. Often we find ourselves saying 'Yes' to a request without thinking it through ... it's ok for others to be disappointed in your answer, it doesn't mean you should give in.
Follow through and honour your commitment towards your needs and self-care.
Ask for what you need and learn to be ok with disappointment if you're told 'no'. Equally, learn to be ok with accepting help if your need it ... it's good for other people to look after you too!

PRACTISE SELF-COMPASSION

Everyone makes mistakes, but how you deal with them has a big impact on your well being and mental health. Like most people, you're probably a great Growth Mindset advocate for the young people in your care, but are you able to apply the same thinking for yourself?

KINDNESS IS KEY

Be kind with your words and keep a check on your inner monologue if you make a mistake. Try to think about yourself as a 'good friend' and talk to yourself accordingly.
You are worthy of the same love and compassion that you extend to others. Your experiences are a normal part of the human race, everyone makes mistakes, it's what you do with them that counts.

Try to be more aware of your thoughts and feelings in a non judgmental way. If you're conscious of working on self-compassion you're less likely to jump straight to negative thinking if something goes wrong. Use the resource below to actively challenge yourself ... could you have been nicer?

FILL UP YOUR CUP

Take time to see yourself as others see you, and give the gift of positive reinforcement to a friend by doing the exercise below together.

Try to be as genuine as you can, and feed back examples of why you think your friend has those qualities. You also need to be prepared to take onboard what's being fed back to you and accept your value to other people.

Repeat the process with other friends and family ... it's a very worth affirming exercise and strengthens bonds between you and the people you care about.